Gorilla Stats as of 5/23/07

Box-score 5/22/07

2007 Summer League Schedule

We just realized that we never posted the summer league schedule. We blame Ryan Dempster & Neal Cotts.

All games are on Tuesday nights at Iglehart field.

May 15th - 6pm vs. Eville Deamons (L 23-13)
May 22nd - 6pm vs. Dyna Kleen
May 29th - 7pm vs. Red Rockets
June 5th - 8pm vs. el Diablo
June 12th - 6pm vs. The Snakes
June 19th - 6pm vs. Eville Deamons
June 26th - 6pm vs Dyna Kleen
July 3rd - 7pm vs. Red Rockets
July 10th - 8pm vs. El Diablo
July 17th - 7pm vs. The Snakes
July 24th - Rain Date
July 31st - Championship night 8pm game.

We'll update Theme Nights here as we schedule them.

The God-Fearing-Bastards Would Like For You To Appologize Now. -or- Yay, Us.

Okay, okay. We admit it. Perhaps we have been making just a few too many blasphemous & distastefull jokes over the last year or two. Hey God: we were only jokin'. Seriously.
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We weren't sure if God was upset about Jerry Falwell croaking, or if he'd just had enough, already with our bullshit... but it sure looked like he was pissed Tuesday night. It rained, thundered, and the wind blew in 40 mph gusts - in every direction. All the while, our little Gorillas were standing out in the field watching youngsters run around the bases.

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When Melon didn't show up till the 4th inning, we knew it was us that had the All-Mighty all in a tissy. And boy, did we regret this post from last year.

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But hey, it was just game one of an 11 game summer season. Yah, we got our asses handed to us this time. But we'll get another shot at those little fuckers, what with their boundless energy, hot girlfriends, and ability to catch fly balls. And when we get that next chance: we won't suck as much. Especially Gerthy.

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Having made His point Tuesday - and really, most of the spring league - the Big Guy gave us a lovely day on Wednesday. Which was good, since the Gorillas were vying for their fifth straight league championship. All we had to do was win two. A heady task, considering we were all bruised & battered from the night prior. Luckily, we had an hour off between games to drink replenishing fluids and strategersize. And so on.

We won, of course.

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Because that's what we do.

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That's all we do.

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We don't know if our Spring League Championship trophey will look much like the one pictured here...but we do plan on wearing a cheerios hat, golf spikes, and a man-ziere when we passionately make out with it.

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How you celebrate is up to you and your beliefs.

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God, bless these Gorillas. (And Cracker.)

Gorilla Stats As Of 5/15/07

Box Score, May 14th

Splitsville -or- "Atta BJ T"

There are lots of things that we like -- that everyone likes -- about the Gashaus Gorillas. For one, there is the bier. The Gorillas always have bier.
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There's also the witty banter, inspired play, on-field leadership, hustle, and skilled glove work.
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Thank Gezus there was bier Wednesday night.
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The Gorillas came out deader than Dillinger in game one. Fortunately PC Quest, the team with numbered sweatshirts, wasn't much better. A couple big innings from the good guys, and a win was salvaged.
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This is becoming a (disturbing) trend for the Gorillas this spring. Slow starts, and slower endings sprinkled with a couple big offensive outbursts that, more often than not, are good enough for a win.
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Unfortunately, that formula didn't work in game 2, and when all was said and done, we ended up where we started -- drinking bier in the parking lot, bad mouthing an absent Flemwad and a broke-dick Beans, and one full game behind PC Quest in the standings.
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But hey, they don't say "ya win some, ya lose some" for nothing. And we don't say it very often. So despite the less-than-stellar performance Wednesday night, there is still a damn good chance of extending the championship streak to 5 straight leagues. All we gotta do is win two games next week (7 p.m. and 9 p.m.) and, whamo!, we're doing the donkey dance and drinking blue yummies from a gold-plated plastic trophy.
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Then we'll take our rightful place in history, thank Gezus we don't keep the book in the spring, and bad-mouth Flemwad and broke-dick Beans.
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That's one of the things we like about the Gashaus Gorillas.

His Mudder Was A Mudder -or- Sometimes You Win, Sometimes You Lose, And Sometimes...It Rains.

As we sit around waiting to lose massive amounts of money betting on horseys to run real fast in circles (we like Dominican in the Derby), we thought we'd update a curious nation, clamoring for knowledge of the goings-ons and where-abouts of their heroes: The Gashaus Gorillas.

Thus far this spring, the Gorillas have battled an inconsistent Mother Nature (sub 40 degree weather, and two rain-outs) an inconsistent roster ("girlfriends" birthday's and "work" functions @ 7 o'clock at night), and inconsistent play.

The Gorillas, though, are undaunted, unaffected, and mostly un-sobered. An impressive 9 players showed up for an obviously rained-out game this Wednesday past. We were nearly moved to tears.

But having good chemistry and plenty of bier in the clubhaus is not enough. The Gorillas stand at 4-2 with four games left in spring play. The 2 games this coming Wednesday (oddly, @ 7&8 p.m.) are against the current league leaders, and are must wins.

So show up early. Bring your rain-gear. Sport your Gorilla colors. And be ready to kick some ass. This is the stuff from which past Gorilla Legends have been created, and the stuff that Gorillas of the future will talk about during rain delays on cold April nights.

And bring bier.