The Gorillas Would Like To Sell You Some Snake-Skinned Boots -or- Cobra Commander Was A Pussy

The guy you see to the right here is Snake Pliskin. If Snake, as played by Kurt Russell in Escape from New York, was a softball team, he'd be the exact opposite of the team we played this Tuesday past, inappropriately called "The Snakes."

I'd like to say that the Gorillas resemble Kurt Russell's Snake, but in reality we're closer to his Dean Proffitt, the carpenter in Overboard that convinced a then-hot and amnesiatic (amnesia'd? amnesiafied? amnesiastic?) Goldie Hawn that she was his wife, mother of his 4 brats, and that she swallowed. We'd totally do that if we got the chance.

I remember seeing Overboard as a young teen that may or may not have been on the verge of a prolific drinking career. Two scenes really caught my attention: the one where the brats super-glued plates to Goldie's hands, and the part where she opens her bier bottle on the edge of a table. Since then I have splintered many a table trying to open biers, and have spent many a dollar on paper plates, krazy-glue and hookers.


I'm not even going to get into the habits I picked up from watching Private Benjamin.