Vote For Bier! -or- Democracy Blows

URGENT MESSAGE FOR ALL GORILLAS AND GORILLAS SUPPORTERS!

You may or may not know that tomorrow is some sort of bullshit “election day.” Yes, I realize that if you are reading this blog, you likely don't vote.

But I disagree! You see, you DO vote... AT THE LIQOUR STORE. And tomorrow, game day, the muthachuckin liquor stores are CLOSED till 6pm. And, seeing as we play at 6pm, the pre-game meeting is @ 5. That's BEFORE the liquor stores close! OMFG!

I will be sending a class three emergency text shortly, so as not to leave any Gorilla unawares. We use the same system as schools do when there’s some Lord Of The Rings nerd shootin’ up the joint for class three emergencies. In class four emergencies we actually rob a liquor store and rape school teachers. Mostly the female ones. I know what you’re thinking, and don’t worry, it’s only happened like three or four times in all of the years we’ve been playing.

So anyways, yah, you better go get bier tonight.

Sexy Update (Live From "Erection Day"):

Last night, in my never-ending efforts to make sure you I drink enough to be able to deal with life hit bombs, I went to a bier-selling establishment - we'll call it, oh, I dunno, "West Side Liquor" - to buy some bier for today. At said establishment, an employee - we'll call him "Bill" - told me that they will not, in fact, be closed today! He said there's some new law and now they can sell bier on days when I wasn't gonna vote anyway.

So there you go, you have absolutely no excuse to show up without bier tonight. Woohoo!